Let me go ahead and write a disclaimer. Columbine was a terrible tragedy and should never be repeated. I am not saying it should be. Don't take it that way. Because someone is bound to think / say / comment somewhere along those lines.

We all know about Columbine. Two teenagers that were making previously-empty threats decided to go shoot up their school, massacring classmates, teachers, whoever else they wanted to. In case you've been living under a rock for the past decade, here's a Wikipedia article.

Usually what people talk about when they say this is that they needed to be locked up, they shouldn't have been there, they shouldn't have had guns, blarblarblar. They fail to recognize that the boys may have saved a lot of lives in that massacre.

Every high school has 'that kid'. You know, the one doesn't really 'fit in' and is constantly being picked on. Even the loners don't want to accept him, and he's not smart enough to be a nerd. He's no good at sports, and is pretty much just someone else to be picked on in the locker room.

Before the massacre occurred, it was so easy to constantly tease and pick on whoever this was, and no one really felt anything from it, excluding, of course, the victim. Everyone just kind of accepted it as regular high school behavior. You go and pick on the "extra" and then you walk off to lunch laughing with your friends. People would make a habit out of harassment, and even convinced themselves to think that it was perfectly okay for them to pick on whoever for a whole day. If they saw tears, that was the holy grail. And there was no one to stand up for the underdogs, although the idea was romanticized in literature and pop culture.

But when two of 'their own' -- that is, two loners that had found each other and had the same hopes for the future -- did something that made the whole nation stop and stare in shock and awe, how could everyone hope to ignore "the type" that these boys were? Since everyone knew someone that fit the stereotype that these boys had fallen into as well, they automatically assumed that these people were going to kill them.

It's easy to say that this is a bad thing, and it is to an extent. I don't know about everyone else, but speaking as the one that was stereotyped, Columbine had a positive effect. Not only were people starting to look my way for the first time, they weren't saying anything. They weren't picking on me, and they would move out of my way when I asked with a tiny voice. Why? Because, in their head, at any moment, I could pull out a gun and kill all of them (I couldn't, of course). I would much rather be not talked to than have people constantly making fun of every action I make.

I've never entered any of the contests before here, and generally kept to myself. But this... this seems like something I could do. After all, my friends tell me I'm pretty cute, but what else are friends for, eh?

If I did this, it'd have to be in audio. I can't stand seeing myself on camera. I just get really red and embarrassed and start pointing out all the strange things I do and how ugly I am. But with audio, it'd give me a chance to actually look at the quality my microphone produces for a much larger project my friends want me to do the technical stuff for. It just might be a win-win situation, if only I wasn't chicken.

Should I do this? Anyone feel like inspiring me?

I figured I'd write something just talking about mundane little details of my life. Just something 'bout me.

• I live in a small town in North Carolina as a community college student. I'm hoping to transfer to University of North Carolina in Chapel Hill next fall.
• I live with my mother, brother, a dog, and a bird. All of which believe they own the house.
• I have terrible study habits. Hence, this blog post.
• I can never, ever, ever say the right thing, and somehow people still like me. This remains a mystery.
• I love anime, and generally being a geek. You'd know it by looking at me, if you could catch the references.
  
• I have a horrid internet addiction.
• I really don't talk the way I write on xanga. It's filled with lots of other fun things [oh, like, umm, yeah, so, etc.] Also, I can make any conversation awkward.
  
• I love writing. It makes me sound smart[er].
  
• I have a midwestern accent, because I didn't move to North Carolina until I was 4. I also have a Southern accent that only comes out around certain people.
• I work at a movie theater, under a boss that is constantly on an inhumane power trip. I can't tell if he's joking or being serious when he's asking a question.
  
• I know quite a bit about code [that is, the kind that people use for secret information], demons (and consequently, exorcism), religions, and grammar. I think it's a bit funny that even though the movie "Paranormal Activity" is as accurate as Hollywood has gotten as far as demons are concerned, people are saying it sucked.
  
• I believe in Christianity, but I am sometimes ashamed to call myself that due to people using it for their own agenda (and there are quite a few on Xanga). You all know who they are.
  
• I'm willing to try just about any food once, if it's there. I love eel in sushi, but deer has to be cooked right.
  
• I want to die young and still have people remember me. Hence, writing.
  
• I hate the Twilight saga. The fans are annoyingly obsessed with an overglittered homeless Robert Pattinson.
  
• I can't stand any particular place at dead silence. I like having a little background noise, even if I zone it out. I love Pandora because of it.
  
• I love music, but I'll only sing to the steering wheel in my car and in the congregation at church. I'm in a constant love-hate relationship with the stage.
  

Today, I put some stuff on Xanga. MLIA.